A Reiki Night to Remember

July 18, 2025

by Alan Wheeler

Before I go to sleep tonight, I need to write this down.

I just gave myself the most healing Reiki treatment I’ve ever experienced. My coming out — and the deeper realization of my authentic self — played a huge role in what unfolded.

Reiki sessions before bed are rare for me, but tonight I felt overdue. I also wanted to try a hand position my Reiki master, Christopher Telles, taught me — one he said should only be used if I planned to sleep afterward. It involves cradling the base of my neck with both hands. “You’ll definitely want to sleep after that one,” he warned.

He wasn’t wrong.

But what happened before the sleepiness was something unexpected. When I moved into the third hand position, I noticed how naturally my arms rested against my sides — a comfortable, almost embracing posture — and I realized it was possible because of the weight I’ve lost over the past year. In that moment, something clicked: I felt actual respect for my physique. Maybe even a little admiration.

For the first time, I could honestly say: I’m decent-looking. I don’t hate my body. I’m at ease in it. And just as that thought settled, another one followed: I’m finally comfortable in my own skin — literally and figuratively.

In that moment, I forgave my younger self — the one who once stood drunkenly in front of a mirror in 1987, declaring how much he hated himself. I felt energy flowing backward in time. A message to that hurting version of me: I forgive you. You were doing the best you could. You are a worthwhile person.

Tears nearly came. What rose instead was something deeper — acceptance, acknowledgment, even love. Not narcissistic love, but the kind of love that says: I see you. I value you. I believe in you.

I saw clearly that I’ve stayed strong through everything. Yes, there were dark times. Yes, I struggled. But they didn’t break me — they forged me. I’ve grown, changed, become better. More resilient. More real.

Tonight, I truly felt it: I’m a good, wonderful person. Not perfect — who is? I may have a dark side — we all do. I may have shadows… and as the Switchfoot song says, “the shadow proves the sunshine.” They’re part of me. I’m complex, human, beautiful. And when the time and place are right, I will find the love I crave and deserve.

But for now, I can finally say the words I never believed I’d earn:

I love myself.

Bully for You: A Song on the Edge

Why Peter Gabriel’s raw cover reveals the true emotional core of Tom Robinson’s lyrics

Lyrical Analysis: “Bully for You”

by Tom Robinson Band – Peter Gabriel version

If you’ve never heard the song, you can listen to both versions here:

🎧 Peter Gabriel version

🎧 Tom Robinson Band version

Title: “Bully for You”

The phrase “bully for you” is deeply sarcastic — an old-fashioned way of saying “good for you”, used here with bite. It sets the emotional tone right away: the speaker isn’t congratulating anyone — they’re seething.

Verse 1:

Cut the cackle / Cause we’re getting to the facts now

Guilt edge security / Hold me back now

Wet blanket at the drop of a hat man / Bully for you, I’m just mad about that, man

This opening is tense and confrontational.

1. “Cut the cackle” means stop the nonsense or superficial talk.
2. “Gilt-edge security” — a clever pun that may combine “gilt” (as in gold) with “guilt,” suggesting false safety or manipulated stability.
3. “Wet blanket at the drop of a hat” paints a picture of someone who instantly spoils joy or undercuts any momentum.
4. “Bully for you, I’m just mad about that, man” is pure sarcasm, but specifically aimed at the wet blanket’s attitude — a mocking, “Oh sure, I really love that”, loaded with disdain. Gabriel delivers it with blistering irony.

Chorus 1:

I hear the sound of dogs in the rain / I know you won’t be back again

We’ve seen it three times on the run / Pass up the chance to / Cut the crap and make it happen / Giving can be fun

This is the first true chorus — melodically distinct and emotionally pivotal.

1. “Dogs in the rain” evokes loneliness, sorrow, and a sense of warning.
2. “Three times on the run” suggests repeated failures or missed emotional opportunities.
3. “Cut the crap and make it happen” becomes a breaking point. In Gabriel’s voice, it’s not a suggestion — it’s a demand. A declaration of: “Enough. Do something.”
4. “Giving can be fun” is delivered with biting sarcasm — shouted, not sung sweetly — exposing the hollowness of idealistic advice.
5. Importantly, this line shares melodic structure with “Make the aching stop”, later in the song. In both, Gabriel draws out the final word like a howl — making both lines echo with emotional anguish rather than hope.

Verse 2:

I’m not afraid, but I don’t want to fight now / This movie’s over so turn that light out

Turn of the screw, tomorrow soon will come and / Wake in the morning, wonder what have you done man

The emotional unraveling deepens here.

1. “I’m not afraid, but I don’t want to fight now” shows the speaker isn’t backing down from fear — they’re just tired.
2. “This movie’s over” signals the end of a personal drama, and “turn that light out” suggests finality.
3. “Turn of the screw” introduces tightening emotional pressure.
4. The morning-after line — “wonder what have you done” — is the bitter residue of a breakdown or lashing out. Regret is already waiting at sunrise.

Chorus 2:

There ain’t another place in town / I’m moving over, going down

Killing time, the morning drop / Final judgement, stay a day to / Find your way to / Make the aching stop

This second chorus shifts into total emotional collapse.

1. “No other place in town” suggests a feeling of exile — physical, emotional, or spiritual.
2. “Going down” signals decline: mental health, emotional control, stability.
3. “Final judgement” adds existential weight.
4. And then: “Make the aching stop.” Like “Giving can be fun,” the line is delivered with identical melodic phrasing — Gabriel draws out the final word, giving it that same howling, tormented quality. It’s not a quiet plea — it’s a desperate scream into the void.

Instrumental Bridge and Chorus Reprise:

After a brief instrumental passage, Chorus 2 is repeated, reinforcing the sense of spiraling despair. The repeated delivery of “Make the aching stop” lands even harder the second time around — an echo of torment, or a soul refusing to go numb.

Final Section:

We don’t need no aggravation (repeated)

The song closes with a stark chant — a mantra for peace, or perhaps emotional surrender.

In Gabriel’s version, Tom Robinson himself joins in vocally — a small but powerful collaboration that confirms this version has the original songwriter’s blessing. It’s like a seal of emotional truth between two artists who’ve both known how heavy a song like this can be.

Performance Contrast:

The original Tom Robinson Band version is solid and sharp — punk-rooted, well-executed, but emotionally guarded. In contrast, Peter Gabriel turns it inside out. Every word is weighted. Every phrase feels like it costs him something.

He doesn’t just sing the song — he bleeds through it.

And for many listeners, myself included, that makes his version not just different — but definitive.

The Illusion of Control

I recently heard a news story about the Chinese government expressing its intent to select the next Dalai Lama. At first, the notion struck me as almost nonsensical — how could a political entity appoint a spiritual leader whose identity is believed to be discovered through reincarnation? When I asked ChatGPT about it through my Alexa device, the political reasoning became clear enough: it’s about control, influence, and the desire to shape a narrative. But even with that understanding, something deeper didn’t sit right with me.

It made me reflect on a broader truth: control, in many ways, is an illusion.

There’s something profoundly contradictory in a government trying to dictate the course of a spiritual tradition. The Dalai Lama isn’t chosen through election or decree — he is recognized through sacred rituals, visions, and centuries of lineage. To attempt to force that process into the machinery of state control is to misunderstand the very essence of what the Dalai Lama represents.

And perhaps that’s the point. When those in power try to control matters of the spirit — matters rooted in belief, intuition, and community — it reveals the limits of power more than its strength. You can command obedience, but you can’t legislate reverence. You can claim authority, but you can’t manufacture faith.

In the end, we are reminded that much of what we think we control — people, ideas, even the future — slips through our fingers the moment we tighten our grip. Real influence comes not from domination, but from understanding. And true leadership, especially of the spiritual kind, arises not from appointment, but from recognition.

What do you think — can something sacred ever truly be controlled? Or does trying to own the sacred only strip it of its power?

From Daydream to Debut

I’m a Published Author!

There was a time—not too long ago—when the idea of becoming a published author felt like nothing more than a daydream. A pleasant thought I would entertain with a smile… and then quickly dismiss. Maybe someday, I told myself.

Well, that someday is now.

I’m thrilled (and still a little stunned) to say I’m officially a published author. My first book is out in the world—not just a manuscript on my screen or a whisper in my imagination, but something real. It’s something readers can download, read, and—if I’ve done my job well—connect with.

This didn’t happen overnight. Like so many writers, I began with scraps of ideas, moments of inspiration, and characters who refused to stay silent. Sometimes the words flowed easily; other times, they trickled out. There were moments of doubt, long pauses, and even longer rewrites. But one idea—the story I had to tell—refused to let go.

Richard Bach once described how some ideas don’t just knock politely; they crash through the wall, grab hold of you, and whisper, “I will not let you go until you set me down in words, on paper.” That’s exactly how it felt. And once that idea had me, I had no choice but to follow through.

And now, here we are.

This is just the beginning. More stories are taking shape, and I’m more energized than ever to keep writing. The creative spark is no longer just a flicker—it’s a steady flame.

If you’d like to see the beginning of this journey, you can visit my Amazon Author page here:

👉 amazon.com/author/alan_wheeler

To those who’ve offered encouragement, listened to my rambles, or just believed I could do it—thank you. Your support means more than you know.

The dream is no longer just a dream. It’s real. And I’m just getting started.

A post I never imagined I would write, but here it is!

🎭 

The Fool’s Task

 — From Side Character to Center Stage

Some stories never quite leave you alone.

Years ago, I came across a BBC audio production of Tom Stoppard’s brilliant play Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead. The premise blew me away—two minor characters from Hamlet, suddenly given center stage. Their story, once a footnote, became the heart of a new tale. I was fascinated by the concept: What happens when you shine a light on someone who was always standing just off to the side?

That idea stuck with me.

A few years later, while reading King Lear and poring over commentaries, I came across a simple but powerful observation: the Fool—Lear’s jester and confidant—vanishes partway through the play with no explanation. One moment he’s there, offering biting wit and strange wisdom… and the next, he’s gone. No farewell. No conclusion.

That observation lit the same creative fire.

What if the Fool was the true guide through Lear’s unraveling? What if he wasn’t just a jester, but something more—something sent to help? What if he was the one carrying the story’s soul?

But for years, I did nothing with the idea. I didn’t trust my writing ability. The vision lingered quietly, tucked away like a half-remembered line from a play I was too nervous to audition for.

Fast forward to today.

AI has become an incredible creative tool, and with the help of ChatGPT, I finally told the story I had imagined so long ago. The result is The Fool’s Task, my first published work—a lyrical, emotionally-driven novella that reimagines King Lear through the eyes of the Fool.

And now, after years of waiting, wondering, and doubting… it’s real.

The Fool’s Task will be available on Amazon Kindle in just a few days. I can’t wait to share it with you.

Sometimes the side character has the most important story of all.

—

🕊️ Stay tuned for the official release announcement.

#TheFoolsTask #DebutAuthor #KingLear #ShakespeareInspired #LiteraryFantasy #IndiePublishing

🥗 Eating Well with Amy’s Kitchen: A Guide to Healthier Frozen Meals

When you think of frozen meals, you might picture ultra-processed, sodium-loaded, preservative-packed boxes from the grocery freezer. But Amy’s Kitchen has built a reputation as the healthier choice — with organic, vegetarian, and often vegan or gluten-free options.

Still, not all Amy’s products are created equal when it comes to nutrition. So I dug in to figure out: Which Amy’s meals are actually the healthiest? Here’s what I found.

✅ What Makes Amy’s Different?

Compared to many mainstream brands like Stouffer’s or Lean Cuisine, Amy’s stands out for:

1. Organic & non-GMO ingredients
2. Vegetarian (often vegan) recipes
3. No artificial preservatives or flavors
4. Transparent, recognizable ingredient lists

But! Just because something is organic doesn’t automatically mean it’s low in calories, fat, or sodium. So let’s break it down.

🥇 Top Amy’s Products for Low Sodium

If you’re watching your salt intake, these are the top 5 low-sodium Amy’s picks:

1️⃣ Light in Sodium Lentil Soup (~340 mg sodium)

2️⃣ Light in Sodium Split Pea Soup (~340 mg sodium)

3️⃣ Light in Sodium Black Bean Vegetable Soup (~340 mg sodium)

4️⃣ Light in Sodium Minestrone Soup (~340 mg sodium)

5️⃣ Indian Golden Lentil Dal with Rice (~540 mg sodium)

💡 Pro tip: Look for the “Light in Sodium” label — soups especially tend to be your best bet for keeping salt low.

🥇 Top Amy’s Frozen Meals with Best Overall Nutrition

Want meals that offer a great balance of protein, fiber, moderate calories, and whole ingredients? Here’s the top 5 list:

1️⃣ Light & Lean Quinoa & Black Beans with Butternut Squash & Chard

(~240 cal, 8g protein, 7g fiber)

2️⃣ Indian Golden Lentil Dal with Rice

(~280 cal, 10g protein, 8g fiber)

3️⃣ Light in Sodium Mexican Casserole Bowl

(~370 cal, 13g protein, 6g fiber)

4️⃣ Tofu Scramble Breakfast Wrap

(~340 cal, 22g protein, 4g fiber)

5️⃣ Chili Mac Bowl

(~410 cal, 15g protein, 3g fiber)

💡 Pro tip: Meals based on lentils, beans, and tofu generally pack the best nutritional punch.

⚠️ Watch Out For…

While Amy’s is better than most when it comes to clean ingredients, here are a few things to keep an eye on:

1. Sodium: Even organic meals can carry 600–900 mg per serving.
2. Saturated fat: Cheese-heavy dishes (like enchiladas or mac & cheese) can be surprisingly rich.
3. Portion size: Some meals are small (300–400 cal) and might leave you hungry.

Final Thoughts

Amy’s Kitchen really does offer some of the healthiest frozen meals on the market — especially if you focus on their “Light & Lean” or “Light in Sodium” lines, or their lentil- and bean-based dishes.

Whether you’re vegetarian, vegan, or just looking to clean up your freezer meals, Amy’s gives you plenty of solid options. But as with any packaged food, read those labels to make sure you’re getting what you want nutritionally.

💬 What’s Your Favorite?

If you have an Amy’s favorite you swear by, drop it in the comments! Let’s build a community of smart, healthy eaters. 🌱🍽️

🥗 Eating Well with Amy’s Kitchen: A Guide to Healthier Frozen Meals

When you think of frozen meals, you might picture ultra-processed, sodium-loaded, preservative-packed boxes from the grocery freezer. But Amy’s Kitchen has built a reputation as the healthier choice — with organic, vegetarian, and often vegan or gluten-free options.

Still, not all Amy’s products are created equal when it comes to nutrition. So I dug in to figure out: Which Amy’s meals are actually the healthiest? Here’s what I found.

✅ What Makes Amy’s Different?

Compared to many mainstream brands like Stouffer’s or Lean Cuisine, Amy’s stands out for:

1. Organic & non-GMO ingredients
2. Vegetarian (often vegan) recipes
3. No artificial preservatives or flavors
4. Transparent, recognizable ingredient lists

But! Just because something is organic doesn’t automatically mean it’s low in calories, fat, or sodium. So let’s break it down.

🥇 Top Amy’s Products for Low Sodium

If you’re watching your salt intake, these are the top 5 low-sodium Amy’s picks:

1️⃣ Light in Sodium Lentil Soup (~340 mg sodium)

2️⃣ Light in Sodium Split Pea Soup (~340 mg sodium)

3️⃣ Light in Sodium Black Bean Vegetable Soup (~340 mg sodium)

4️⃣ Light in Sodium Minestrone Soup (~340 mg sodium)

5️⃣ Indian Golden Lentil Dal with Rice (~540 mg sodium)

💡 Pro tip: Look for the “Light in Sodium” label — soups especially tend to be your best bet for keeping salt low.

🥇 Top Amy’s Frozen Meals with Best Overall Nutrition

Want meals that offer a great balance of protein, fiber, moderate calories, and whole ingredients? Here’s the top 5 list:

1️⃣ Light & Lean Quinoa & Black Beans with Butternut Squash & Chard

(~240 cal, 8g protein, 7g fiber)

2️⃣ Indian Golden Lentil Dal with Rice

(~280 cal, 10g protein, 8g fiber)

3️⃣ Light in Sodium Mexican Casserole Bowl

(~370 cal, 13g protein, 6g fiber)

4️⃣ Tofu Scramble Breakfast Wrap

(~340 cal, 22g protein, 4g fiber)

5️⃣ Chili Mac Bowl

(~410 cal, 15g protein, 3g fiber)

💡 Pro tip: Meals based on lentils, beans, and tofu generally pack the best nutritional punch.

⚠️ Watch Out For…

While Amy’s is better than most when it comes to clean ingredients, here are a few things to keep an eye on:

1. Sodium: Even organic meals can carry 600–900 mg per serving.
2. Saturated fat: Cheese-heavy dishes (like enchiladas or mac & cheese) can be surprisingly rich.
3. Portion size: Some meals are small (300–400 cal) and might leave you hungry.

Final Thoughts

Amy’s Kitchen really does offer some of the healthiest frozen meals on the market — especially if you focus on their “Light & Lean” or “Light in Sodium” lines, or their lentil- and bean-based dishes.

Whether you’re vegetarian, vegan, or just looking to clean up your freezer meals, Amy’s gives you plenty of solid options. But as with any packaged food, read those labels to make sure you’re getting what you want nutritionally.

💬 What’s Your Favorite?

If you have an Amy’s favorite you swear by, drop it in the comments! Let’s build a community of smart, healthy eaters. 🌱🍽️

Discovering the Gita

 Discovering the Gita I first encountered the Bhagavad Gita through an unexpected source—Steven Pressfield’s novel The Legend of Bagger Vance . I had heard that Pressfield modeled the story on the Gita, with Rannulph Junuh serving as a modern-day Arjuna, and Bagger Vance embodying Krishna. At the time, I didn’t fully grasp the depth of that connection. The spiritual roots of the story were intriguing, but the Gita itself felt distant—like something ancient, elusive, and hard to relate to.

Years passed before I truly returned to the Bhagavad Gita , this time through the words of Eknath Easwaran. His translation and commentary opened a door I hadn’t been ready to walk through before. I found in Easwaran not just a translator, but a teacher. Though he had passed away by the time I discovered him, his voice lived on in his books, his recordings, and his gentle yet clear guidance. His book Passage Meditation became a lifeline, a method of internalizing sacred teachings through daily practice.

As I read the Gita through Easwaran’s lens, it began to unfold for me—layer by layer. I realized that I wasn’t just reading about Arjuna anymore. In a metaphorical sense, I had become Arjuna. I was the one standing in the middle of the battlefield of life, uncertain, overwhelmed, and searching for clarity. And the wisdom offered in those verses, especially the idea of detachment—not in the sense of apathy, but of balanced engagement—spoke directly to my spirit.

The concept of taking action without being entangled in the results, of finding peace regardless of success or failure, was something I desperately needed. Life had often pulled me toward extremes—hope and disappointment, effort and exhaustion. The Gita reminded me that balance wasn’t just possible; it was essential.

I won’t pretend I’m consistent in studying the Gita , or any sacred text. I’m not. But I return to it, again and again, drawn by the clarity it brings. And I hope to explore not just the Gita , but other sacred writings from around the world. I want to build a foundation of spiritual understanding—not dogma, but something deeper: equilibrium . A way of standing still and strong, no matter what the world throws at me.